Separation at ECFE

Last week was week three of ECFE. It was also the first time that we separated--adults in one room, kids in the other. It starts with us playing in the room as we have for the last couple of weeks, getting the kids comfortable with their surroundings, and then we say goodbye and let them stay with the teachers and the other kids for a while. Nathaniel didn't seem to have any problem when I was first leaving. He wasn't interested in even looking at me or paying me much mind when I said "Daddy's going to go bye-bye," just continuing to play and look around the room for new toys. When I'd left and was watching through the one-way mirror, he was watching the other parents leave and saying "bye-bye" to them as they went out the door. I was relieved that it had gone well. Then within ten minutes of us being in the parents' room, we got a call that he wasn't doing too well and so I brought down Leo and his pacifier. When we went back at the end, I could see him walking around the room while one of the teachers blew bubbles, his pacifier hanging from his overalls by it's leash. He absently put it in his mouth, and then let it fall.

I felt like I shouldn't have brought the thing down to him. I should ahve let him have Leo and then if he still needed it brought the pacifier. He does so well at home just having it in the car or stroller or at nap times. I don't want him to start using it more regularly. The teacher said that it was a big help, but I don't want him to be using it every time he needs to calm himself down. I want him to have other strategies for that. We'll see how it goes next week, but I will have to actually assert that if I can and hope that it goes better as he has done it once before.